Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Duel at Diablo - Thank God For Potier


I haven't been keeping up on this blog, I know... and I know that all 3 of you reading this right now are just biting your nails off in anticipation of my next review. So I decided to throw all y'alls a bone and review something a little more obscure... something a little easier to express my views on, something a little... um, you know... shitty.

Duel at Diablo. Where to start with this awesome piece of movie? How about on the good side, first of all: the ballinnest of ballin' actors, sire Sidney Potier. I'm sorry, but if you don't like this dude, you've probably got to get more comfortable with other races, cuz the dude's straight-mackin! I mean, he's been fed this flimsy script, co-starring with the decent James Garner, and being forced to listen to what has to be the worst fucking soundtrack in the history of film... and yet there he is, doin' his thang thang, making the movie sexy. I mean, manly! Shit...

Back to the film as a whole: this does not make sense! Let's run the numbers, shall we:

1) 1800's
2) Black man with white soldiers
3) Indians abusing white people, and that guy with the sun tan goin' along for the ride.

Okay, so that's the score. We've got this interesting little set-up don't we? With a combo like that, this film could be a great commentary on racial tensions and a statement about westerns, amirite? Parallels between black people and Native 'Murricans post war? They must be going somewhere with that premise... Or are they?


Why do you laugh, Sidney? Oh... Because he thought that was a joke.

Nope, this movie bucks convention by ignoring any racial tension... well, I mean, Sidney is a cool dude, but fuck those Indians.* James, Sidney, and the captain get along just swell, but they all have that one thing in common: this chief dude wants to kill them and take the white woman's baby!!! SAVE THE WHITE WOMAN!!!!!!!!!

Who is to blame for this whole fiasco? Well, I could start with director Ralph Nelson. Why? There are plenty of bad choices he made: the moments the composition is used, the lack of any real effective moments, the inability to make a bad script good... Then again, he made Lilies in the Field, which I haven't seen, but heard good things about it. So I'll just blame leading lady Bibi Anderson... why? Because she sucks so much, someone has to.


Bibi: So how am I doing, James?
James: Kiddo, you suck at acting.

I could go on and on, but fuck it, this isn't even funny anymore.

Overall - 2, for a couple of dudes who could act and the fact that it made me chuckle from time to time. I recommend skipping this and listening to some Funkadelic. Why? What a stupid question.2

* - Holy shit these aren't my personal views.

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